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Hey! Ready for some absolutely bonkers 911 stories? These aren’t your usual emergencies - think people calling about missing microwaves or squirrels needing peanut butter. Let’s dive into the craziest calls that 911 operators have ever had to deal with. Buckle up and enjoy the ridiculousness!
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An elderly lady was convinced someone put a "root" (like voodoo) on her because some white powder appeared on her porch. The operator basically told her to sweep it up, toss it over her shoulder, and all was well. Problem solved, no curses needed.
A kid hanging around the ambulance station picked up a call from a man who'd dialed the wrong number. The man was saying goodbye because he felt hopeless. The dispatcher’s mom stepped in, talked to him for hours, and the guy is still alive thanks to that accidental connection. Talk about fate!
From a person unable to open a peanut butter jar (because squirrels might get mad) to someone freaked out about moonlight looking like a HUGE fire, these calls remind us that emergencies come in all shapes and sizes - even parakeet rescues from trees!
Somebody actually called 911 to complain their neighbor hadn't mowed their lawn. The kicker? The lawn belonged to an on-duty cop. So guess who got the job of enforcing the complaint? Yep, the cop himself. Talk about awkward neighborhood watch!
A guy asked if the 911 line was recorded and, once assured it was, went ahead and recited his last will - then shot himself. Hey, free notarization for your will, right? Talk about making the most of your call.
On Christmas morning, a frantic caller asked how to get cranberry sauce out of the can without it coming out in chunks. The operator told her to open the other end and slide it out like a boss. She hung up, thanked them like a genius, and later got a citation for misusing 911. Merry Christmas indeed!
Back in the day, a 4-year-old managed to rotary dial the Ohio State Highway Patrol just to have them come arrest his mom for not letting him go play in the rain. Spoiler: Mom wasn't arrested, but that kid’s sneak game was strong.
A guy called 911 to report a fire on a hillside just outside town. He got more and more panicked about the growing blaze until the operator gently reminded him it was just the sun rising. Oops. Morning no coffee struggles, right?
A guy panicked about a wild bobcat keeping people from entering the library. The responder showed up expecting a big wildcat drama but found a friendly tabby snoozing on a bench. The guy was shocked to learn the 'bobcat' was actually someone's pet. Everyone calm, cat happy.
A bunch of boys got caught prank calling emergency services. The lunch lady reported them, police fined them, and parents grounded them for a month, took away electronics, and made them pay fines. School never saw them misbehaving again. Lesson learned loud and clear!
Guy calls 911 about a suspicious package on his porch. Cop shows up, asks if he ordered anything from Amazon. Yep. Cop hands it over and heads out. Guy apologizes and goes inside. Mystery solved with zero fuss!
Someone figured out the company’s emergency line rings straight to a guy's phone and started using it to get help with computer network problems - because, obviously, the 911 line is tech support now. Spoiler: the director wasn’t thrilled.
Guy calls 911 at midnight because the shared microwave in his rooming house was missing. Dispatcher checks if he asked the landlord. Nope. Dispatcher tells him it’s not an emergency, but the guy insists on cops coming ASAP because he’s HUNGRY. Officers show up and end up citing him for wasting time. He even pleaded not guilty and had to represent himself. Jury took 20 minutes to say guilty. Classic.
The local police get tons of calls from retirees who think brown people are burglars. One complaint was about a "strange woman entering a neighbor's house" - turns out it was the new housekeeper. Sometimes the biggest drama is just boredom and suspicion.
A lady panics and calls ambulance because her kid might be allergic to packing peanuts that came in an Amazon box. Operator tries their best to reassure, but wow talk about a jump to conclusions! Spoiler: no allergic reactions, just a confused mom.
911 dispatcher hears an elderly woman report a "black guy" just sitting in the park. When asked why it’s a problem, she said "he shouldn't be there." Dispatcher is ready to send cops... on her. Seriously, some people.
ER staff share how young dudes always show up after their very first major hangover. Spoiler: no alcohol poisoning, just some hangover drama and lots of laughs from the staff.
A clearly drunk guy, possibly underage and definitely falling over, calls 911 because the restaurant won’t serve him alcohol. Managers were already trying to get cops to pick him up. This dude went full drama queen on 911. Spoiler: not a win.
A guy called 911 just so he could watch fire trucks and ambulances with sirens. The plan backfired when a cop showed up - and dude got a night in jail. Side note: curiosity killed the caller, folks.
A woman called 911 at 2 am because her legs were turning blue. Turns out those fancy new jeans she wore to the club caused it. Emergency? More like fashion emergency!
A guy called 911 insisting his roommates were turning into giant crabs trapped in cocoons. Dispatcher just nodded along because… well, they’ve heard weirder things.
Someone called 911 to get her mugshot removed from the internet. Result? Charged with misuse of 911 and gained a brand new mugshot to add to the collection. Oh, the irony!
A hotel guest thought dialing 911 would get them the front desk. Dispatcher had to explain the obvious: 911 is for emergencies. Guest’s husband wasn’t too amused. Lesson: reading signs helps!
Woman called an ambulance because she had the flu - saying it was cheaper than a taxi since she had Medicare. Meanwhile, paramedics missed a kid who stopped breathing nearby because of the slow response. Sad but true.
A drunk guy threw pizza at people and then called 911 to report he was being harassed - while officers were arresting him. Dispatcher heard an officer say "Is that our dispatcher on the phone?" before the call got shut down. Comedy gold.
Caller was upset that a deer swam across the river near their house and might be cold. Dispatcher gently reminded them that it’s a wild animal and would probably be just fine. Nature is messy, folks.
A squad got called because a caller pooped and couldn’t wipe themselves clean. Yep, you read that right. Never thought battle of the bum would be a 911 emergency.
A lady called 911 from a McDonald's drive-thru because they were out of chicken nuggets. Operators were like, nope, not an emergency. But come on, nuggets are serious business!
In the UK, a very drunk lady called 999 to report her lost coat. When told it wasn’t an emergency, she freaked out. Everyone’s drunk moments are different!
Someone called police non-emergency about hearing gunshots nearby. Officer told them next time to call 911 instead to get a faster response. Yeah, we’re all overthinking these calls sometimes.
Guy calls 911 to report a bad dream, another lost control and couldn’t get his car into the driveway. Yep, “can you park it for me?” happened. 911 operators have seen it all.
A guy called 911 at 3 AM because he picked a wart and it was bleeding. Yep, nothing else. Just a wart. Seriously.
A guy with a broken finger demanded ambulance transport even though his house was just two blocks away. Another patient delayed because a dude wanted one last cigarette before hospital. Priorities, people!
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