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19 Wild Stories From People Who Grew Up With Narcissistic Moms (Yep, It’s As Nuts As It Sounds)
Hey, let’s dive into some seriously wild stories from folks who grew up with moms that were a bit too wrapped up in themselves. You’ll find drama, resilience, and a whole lot of “Wait, did that really happen?!” moments ahead. Here we go!
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So, this 12-year-old niece totally caught onto her grandma’s toxic vibes. During a family incident, grandma made a nasty ‘joke’ about suicide right in front of the kid. Instead of staying quiet, the niece faced the music head-on, called grandma out for being messed up and toxic, and told her she never wants to see her again. That’s some next-level courage right there!
And get this - when grandma tried to force a hug like nothing had happened, the niece just flat-out said "Don't touch me." Cold as ice, and then bounced with her mom. This kid? Future legend!
For decades, this person was told they were stupid, just like their dad, and did believe it… until 30 hit. Then, they kicked that doubt to the curb, chased their dreams, went full No Contact with the negativity, and BAM - now they’re rocking a PhD program they always wanted. Talk about coming out swinging!
Ever get those classic lines like "She still loves you" or "You’re lucky to have a mom" thrown at you when you’ve cut toxic ties? Yeah, this person wishes people would just stop with the guilt trips. Sometimes, choices about family stuff are way more complicated than outsiders get. Straight up honest and relatable vibes here.
We chatted with some smart folks in psychology who shared how having a narcissistic mom shapes kids’ minds and hearts. One expert, Dr. Amy Kincaid Todey, said kids often feel love is like a secret prize they have to earn, which totally messes with how they connect with others later on.
Daring kid calls out mom on gaslighting. Mom’s comeback? "Never gaslighted you, must be all in your head." The irony’s so thick, you could cut it with a knife. Cue the eye roll.
Someone said they told their closest friends about going NC with their narcissistic mom but didn’t spill all the juicy details. Well, the crew went full ninja and blocked mom on Facebook so she couldn’t snoop around. Safe, sound, and feeling all the warm fuzzies. Friends for the win!
Picture this: mom freaks about a not-so-perfect school bag, daughter swoops in with the sweetest pep talk - messing up is okay. Cue mom crying in the bath because, hey, healing is messy but powerful. The circle of life, but make it emotional.
EMDR pro Christy Doering added daughters especially get hit hard, worrying constantly about what others think and trying to be ‘perfect’ because their parents steal their spotlight.
Ever notice how everyone expects you to understand their messy past, but they can’t be bothered to see your side? Here’s someone calling out that double standard loud and clear. Spoiler alert: No more free passes for toxic behavior.
Imagine breaking a bowl, expecting a yelling marathon, but instead your stepmom says, "I got more ice cream for you," and Calms the storm. Not your birth mom, but this kindness made a big impact and flipped a life view. Not all moms are created equal, folks!
Spending time with toxic mom during lockdown, this person finally clocked why they were an overweight kid - mom’s guilt-tripping cookie ploys. Refuse? Cue the meltdown. So, they just ate it all, scared of the fallout. Weight gain wasn’t accidental; it was emotional buffet manipulation.
Licensed psychologist Zita Chriszto said these kids might hide their true selves because they’re scared of being dumped or disapproved of. So they basically become whatever others want - hello, identity crisis!
Jewelry? Check. Houseplants? Check. Cool hoodie? Double check. This person wasn’t messing around on Mother’s Day - they self-gifted a total self-care package because guess what? They raised themselves, and that counts.
Everyone’s like, “Wow, you’re so mature for your age!” But this isn’t a compliment here - it’s a survival badge. This person wished they could’ve been a kid instead of being forced to adult because their narcissistic mom dropped the ball so hard, they had to pick it up. Oof.
Whoops, spaghetti everywhere! But nope, no yelling, just a calm "Are you okay?" from husband, some cleanup, and the dog even scored three meatballs. The real kicker? The only angry person was me. Wow, what a revolution from the usual chaos.
Funny thing: moms usually have a bigger emotional hold than dads in this scenario. Zita points out that moms act like a mirror to their kids, and if it’s a warped mirror, that can leave kids feeling like they don’t know their own worth.
Working in senior care, this person sees how nasty parents who treated their kids badly end up: totally alone during their toughest times, no advocates, no family showing up. The kids? Totally justified in walking away. No judgment here, just facts.
When this person hit 18, they said ‘never again’ to their toxic parents. They meant it and last saw them nearly three years ago. Guess what? Life has been good, healing is happening, and happiness is a real thing for them now. Cutting toxic ties can be a blessing in disguise.
Marriage therapist Lexi Michaud had a cool way of putting it: moms are like the first relationship kids ever have. So if that’s rocky, it hits deep and leaves some serious emotional scars.
Picture little me, excitedly giving mom a homemade birthday card. Mom’s reply? "Stop making cards, store ones mean more." Perfect way to break a tiny heart and turn a kid into an anti-capitalist crusader. Great job, Mother’s Day.
Sturdy, strong wife doesn’t often break down, but when told “I’m so proud of you” during a pizza date, tears welled up. Turns out, hearing real praise might’ve been a first for her. Proof that kindness can be the greatest gift.
Here’s a tasty metaphor: being raised by narcissists feels like chomping on a meal that’s burnt on the outside but frozen inside. You’re emotionally neglected and ignored all at once - talk about a terrible combo deal.
Healing? It’s a long, twisty road. Zita recommends grieving for the mom you wished you had, not the one who let you down - and start building a fortress of self-love brick by brick.
Want to know what emotional abuse sounds like? Picture young kid getting yelled at with the fury of Gordon Ramsay over a spilled glass of water. Oh, and there’s a chance of getting hit on top. Shudder.
When I told my husband he walks loud, he quipped, “That’s because I was never punished for reminding my parents I exist.” Now, that’s a power move disguised as a noisy step.
Parents said “you’ll understand when you have kids,” right? Well, 14 years in and nope, no understanding arrived. Just the truth that their parenting was a mess. Bonus: they’re doing their own thing and not becoming their parents. Score!
Lexi says therapy is a game-changer. It’s like giving yourself a second chance at that relationship and learning to be your own biggest fan.
Want the truth? Narcissists? They don’t change. They won’t get your point, apologize, or magically become what you want. So why waste your time hoping? Peace out and save your sanity.
Covert narcissistic mom’s favorite sport: get you calm, push every button, trigger an outburst, then flash that sly grin and say, “Look how crazy you’re acting!” Or “Why are you yelling?” Gross.
Mom said she’d never talk to me again, hoping I’d break down begging to be taken back. Plot twist: I took her at her word, cut contact on my own terms, and I’m feeling fantastic. Who’s the boss now? That’s right, me!
Dr. Todey says healing isn’t about blaming the past but grabbing your right to be loved as you are - no strings attached. Mic drop.
Me: “That thing you said hurt.”
Mom: “I was joking!” “Never said that!” “You’re just sensitive!” “You’re misremembering!” Repeat until dizzy. Classic denial dance.
Here’s a thought: If you keep telling kids, “Your abusive parent loves you,” how exactly do you expect teens to realize abuse isn’t love? Food for thought.
This mom’s classic narcissist mom bitched out a six-year-old for politely refusing kisses. The kid said “No, thank you,” and hugged grandma instead. Grandma flipped, kissed the kid anyway, then whined about how ‘badly’ kid acted. Mom shut that crazy down hard. Mic drop.
Spilled spaghetti and meatballs everywhere. Rather than yelling, hubby calmly asked if I’m okay, cleaned it up, FIL offered to steam clean, dog got a tasty bonus, and peace prevailed. Only person mad? Me. Wild, right?
Someone said it best: if it takes a village to raise a kid, it also takes one to abuse them. This person’s narcissistic mom had an entire squad circling, making sure the kid was alone, scared, and obedient. Even the would-be heroes got warned off or gave up. Nope, no lone wolves here - whole pack involved.
Dear narcissistic parents: When I said “I don’t know” to your questions, don’t think I was lying. I was guessing which answer wouldn’t set off your unpredictable rage. That was survival.
Picture being home alone, loving the peace, and then sensing that moment when an NParent walks in and the tension drops like a bomb. Instant mood switch. We’ve all been there.
Spotted on Twitter and it hits hard: “My parents always said, ‘I give you food and shelter,’ like did you read the fine print of having a kid? What, were you gonna leave me in the street?” Exactly!
Early riser here, and my new housemate said from the next room, “You don’t have to try to be quiet.” Cue surprising tears. Growing up, every noise I made seemed to annoy my parents. Suddenly, this was liberating. Small moments, big feelings.
Anyone else struggle to finish a sentence because you’re used to getting cut off? This makes conversations tricky - sometimes feeling like you jumble words mid-sentence and wait for someone else to finish it for you. You’re definitely not the only one.
Someone said, “I didn’t have role models growing up, just people I never wanted to turn into.” Sometimes, avoiding negativity is the best motivation.
Called to court to spill the truth about mom drugging and tattooing me against my will. Judge took the info seriously, and mom pleaded guilty instead of blame-shifting. Now my brother and I rock a great foster home. Happy ending, sort of.
Heads up: being the ‘obedient child’ doesn’t mean managing your parents’ mood swings. It’s actually their job to help kids learn emotional control. If they haven’t grown up, it’s not your fault.
Hating your parents? Yeah, that’s intense. It usually means there’s serious reasons behind it. So instead of calling someone ungrateful or bratty, maybe take a moment to consider why before rushing to fix things.
No matter what thinkpieces say, it’s perfectly fine not to feel love for your family - especially if they wrecked your chance at it. You can’t just switch that feeling on, and it’s not your fault.
“I shouldn’t HAVE to ask, you should just do it.” Translation? Mom’s too lazy to clean, gets mad at you for not reading her mind, and then guilts you all day. Classic move that’s annoying AF.
This phrase meant three decades of screaming matches and tears growing up. Now even small talks at boyfriend’s house make me nervous, waiting for the storm that rarely comes. Can we just skip this anxiety, please?
Mom made me sit up for hours while braiding my hair painfully tight. If I started dozing or wiping tears, she’d yank me upright by my hair. Now, anyone touching my hair or even complimenting it makes me tense or flinch. Ouch.
Mom’s calling me selfish for not choosing Disney World for my Make-A-Wish. I want to go to Japan with aunt and sibling instead. Parents don’t have passports or time, so tough luck, Mom.
Mom found out I’m pregnant and wants me to pay her back for raising me from age 0-11. Like, what? I hung up on her, stopped answering blocked calls, and realize some people just don’t change. Feels bad, but I’m not taking the bait anymore.
Mom launches mean, damaging blows nonstop but turns into a sobbing mess the moment someone stands up to her calmly. The ultimate emotional rollercoaster.
“When you have kids you’ll understand,” they said. Well, having kids showed me just how awful my parents really were. No thanks for that lesson.
The longer I parent, the deeper I know: child abuse doesn’t just happen from stress or tiredness. It’s a choice people make. Plain and simple.
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