Wild Things Teens Did to Their Bodies to Fit In (And Wow, Just Wow)

I actually used a nail file on my teeth to get those sharp vampire vibes. It felt cool...until it didn’t.

I sucked in my belly all the time to get that tiny waist...now my stomach muscles feel stuck, and I’m like, ‘Can I please breathe?’

I slapped ice packs on my stomach thinking I could freeze the fat away. After 45 minutes, my skin got numb and hard. Then, I poured boiling water on it to ‘unfreeze’ it and ended up with a nasty scar.

I thought brushing my teeth for hours would make them super white. Instead, I ended up with enamel like an elderly person. Oops!

I stabbed myself with a sewing needle and put brown ink on the wounds to fake freckles. Spoiler: 14 years later, they’re still hanging around.

My gap was so wild I literally pushed my front teeth together using the edge of my toy house. And guess what? It actually worked.

I wrapped rubber bands around my front teeth to close a gap. Now my teeth tilt towards each other. Ouch.

I pretended my vision was bad to get those cute, quirky glasses. Now, surprise! I actually need them.

Yeah, I wrapped myself up in plastic wrap every single night because someone said it might help. Spoiler alert: it didn’t.

I actually poked myself with a needle and drew a beauty mark with eyeliner at 16. Still see it when I wipe makeup off!

I never stopped sucking in my stomach as a kid, and now my ribs flare out badly. Who knew bad habits could do that?

Couldn't wait for new piercings, so I just shoved earrings through my ear. Ouch? Definitely.

I was always tall but wanted to be short and cute, so I slouched and leaned on one leg nonstop. Now I’m basically a human question mark.

Yeah, I tried zapping my freckles off with chemicals only for them to come back as a trend later. Facepalm.

I just snipped off a mole on my face. Looking back, maybe not the brightest idea.

I obsessed over Gerard Way and copied how he talked for hours. Now, I sound like a 50-year-old chain smoker. Thanks, me.

I had a skin tag, cut it off myself, and now there’s a hole in my skin. Yay.

Spent about an hour a day dragging my face across the carpet because I thought red cheeks looked cute. Spoiler: not so much.

I pressed my fingers hard on my cheeks trying to get dimples. Ended up with little varicose veins instead. Go figure.

I stared at the sun for a few seconds because I was jealous of people with glasses. My eyes hurt so bad - I definitely don’t recommend it.

I used nail glue to put rhinestones on my teeth. Why? Because I thought it’d look cool. Spoiler: it did not.

I was so insecure about my arm hair that I covered my arms in clear nail polish to convince family I had a skin thing and they’d shave me. The doctor wasn’t buying it.

I shaved my entire face once, and my mom asked me in front of friends if I had really done it. BIG oof moment!

A friend once said she could give me a pencil tattoo. Yeah. That turned into a permanent heart-shaped scar on my wrist.

I thought wearing a bobby pin on my nose would shrink it. Spoiler: it didn’t. But I looked funny!

Wanted a chin like Demi Lovato so badly I scratched a line on mine for months until my mom made me stop. Yep, still got the scar.

Used to snack on tiny salt packets like candy. No wonder my heart raced all the time.

YouTube told me to put loom bands and earring backs on my teeth for fake braces. I blame the internet for my dumb decisions.

Used a nail file on my nose to shrink it, scratched my eyes to get glasses, and smashed my face on my bunk bed hoping my teeth would fall out sooner. Spoiler: none of this worked.

I woke up every day at 3 AM to do 150 sit-ups, thinking metabolism peaks then. Didn’t eat much, so now my tummy hurts, and I can’t tell when I’m hungry. Oops.

Stayed up all night doing ab workouts and chugging lemon water by 8 AM because I thought I’d get abs fast. Spoiler: I got tired and grumpy instead.

Wanted braces so badly I used rubber bands from my friend’s braces, which made my front teeth tilt toward each other. Lesson learned.

I tried to pierce my lip myself twice. It was super painful, messy, and not at all sanitary. Don’t try this at home, folks.

I put salt in my eyes hoping to damage them enough to get glasses. Now I have real eyesight problems. Worth it? Nope.

I had terrible posture and even scoliosis from thinking surfer-girl slouching looked awesome. Spoiler: it didn’t.

Someone told me my eyelashes were long and I thought that was bad, so I clipped them with nail clippers. Flair not included.

I used to press my nose hard to shrink it. Now I have a deviated septum on one side. Definitely not a win.

I used a regular earring to pierce my own bellybutton. Didn’t turn out great, obviously.

The internet said raw honey could lighten eye color, so I dumped it in my eyes. Now, I’m all about appreciating dark brown eyes.

I pushed corners into my legs to get bruises because I thought it looked cool. Now I’m stuck with dents, marks, and easily bruised skin.

Remember making back dimples by poking your skin with a pen? Yeah, me too. Dream big, right?

I hid one eye with a side bang hoping I’d get glasses. Now I have a lazy eye *and* a permanent side bang.

Flat-footed me walked on the outside of my feet on purpose. Now I have bowed legs and a crooked spine. Fun times!

I wasn’t allowed to dye my hair, so I painted it red with a marker. Neck, clothes, everything got red. Not my best look.

I wasn’t a fan of my blonde hair, so I darkened my eyebrows with black mascara and used coffee and eyeshadow to dye my hair. My eyebrows stayed dark for years.

I couldn’t raise one eyebrow, so I practiced holding the other one down. It worked, but now one eyebrow is pointy and the other isn’t. Oops!

At 9, tired of sweat stains, I sprayed deodorant all over my body thinking I’d stop sweating. Now I have burn scars, so no more spraying everything.

When my baby teeth stopped falling out, I just pulled the last three myself - in about an hour. Dentist? Nah.

Anyone else try to get dimples by poking your cheeks with a pen? Yeah, that was me.

I was so insecure I got up at 4 AM every day just to do my makeup before school. It felt like wearing a mask.

I pretended I needed glasses to cover a mole. Now, I can’t see beyond my hand. Oops.

I used to smirk whenever I was asked to smile and now my smile and talking style are lopsided. Thanks, past me.

One of my eyebrows always looks lifted because I copied Bella Swan and forced the look until it stuck. Fancy that.

I wanted a raspy voice, so I screamed into a pillow. Mission accomplished, I guess.

I purposely stayed up late to get under-eye bags ’cause I thought they looked cool. Now, I just look tired and sick.

I made my sneeze high-pitched and adorable on purpose. Now it’s stuck and I literally can’t stop it. Great.

I copied Quinn Fabray’s lilting voice and lip purse in fifth grade. Guess what - I still talk like that. Awesome.