Real Talk: Priests and Nuns Who Said, “Nah, This Isn’t For Me”

So, this guy’s uncle was a priest and also gay — but the bishop wanted all priests to tell people to vote against gay marriage in California's Prop 8. Instead, the uncle went rogue. At the end of mass, he came out as gay, gave a powerful speech about why voting yes on Prop 8 was wrong, and got suspended. Now he’s an LGBT activist and pretty much a legend.

Back in the '60s, this uncle joins a seminary but bails after a few months because it was full of ‘creepy gay guys playing mind games’ — and he didn't even know that was a thing back then. He later figures it out, comes out, builds a cabin by hand, and writes gay cowboy romances. Basically, the coolest uncle ever.

This uncle went to seminary but couldn’t handle the endless silence. Like, imagine being told to hush all day, every day! So, he left and went on to have a family. Apparently, his kids grew up doing good stuff, including some local political heroics.

In 1974, a guy left a seminary in the Netherlands because the novice master couldn't keep his hands to himself. Yeah, that happened. No wonder he bolted.

This aunt and uncle both left religious life and fell in love. They still love their faith, but clearly, love won. Plus, funny family stories about a mom who almost took vows but decided family was more her style.

This former seminarian went through three tough years. He got labeled a 'liberal' and was looked down on. The seminary was full of rich conservative guys and barely any real charity work. He finally left, broke free, and started piecing his life back together.

Dad was a priest in the 60s-70s but left after his mom passed away. The letters show he was pretty bummed about church politics and bad missionary assignments. Many priests back then left when they realized they’d been shoved into a tough life early on.

This uncle couldn’t stomach the priest abuse crisis of the '80s. He found out some bosses were hiding bad behavior and got super depressed. He talked to his bishop, met a lady, got married (church paperwork be darned), and switched careers to become a psychologist. Many priests did the same.

A seminarian for 3 years, this guy blamed his parents’ divorce for his early religious zeal, but eventually realized he was gay. Seminary was a prison of watchful eyes and rules, so he left to live a life he truly loved — now happily in a relationship and dabbling in Norse mythology just for kicks.

This guy was a priest for 21 years. Leaving felt like dropping a gigantic weight. He lost some friends but gained peace, a new career, and an amazing wife. Life after priesthood? Way better, no kidding.

Spent about a decade as a religious sister, left due to an eating disorder and bad treatment from other sisters. Therapy and healing are ongoing, but leaving was the best decision ever.

Called to be a Jesuit brother, stayed five years, then left after some serious thinking. Spent decades working with street kids in Africa, got hitched, raised three kids, and now enjoys a peaceful quiet life.

Just got tired of twisting my brain trying to make church 'facts' make sense. Gave up — and felt way lighter after.

After mental health challenges and growing duties became too much, this seminarian had to make the hard call to step away. It wasn’t easy building a new life and dealing with how others saw him, but he’s learning and healing — even if he misses free food!

After a few years in seminary, this guy met his wife and it all clicked — turns out God meant him to marry, not be a priest. Now happily married for eight years, and totally thankful for the journey.

The bishop said he wouldn’t get far in priesthood because he wasn’t Greek enough. So, he’s been trying to serve God in other ways while navigating church politics that sometimes feel like a lava pit.

Spent a few years in seminary, prayed it over, and discovered married life was the call. Married for 4 years with two kiddos. Happy camper alert!

This community was full of drama, mental health issues, and secret meetings that felt like a TV show. Six out of 11 sisters in training left in one crazy week, pulling off some prison-escape style exits. Not the plan anyone wanted, but hey, desperate times.

This priest hated being in charge of annulments because helping end marriages felt awful. He tried everything to get out, and finally just left the priesthood.

A nun got pushed past her limits by bullying, family cut-offs, gaslighting, and nonstop work. No spiritual director helped. She left feeling like a shell. Mass and faith now come with anger, therapy, and no warm fuzzy feelings — but hey, she’s still in the club, sharing stories with other survivors.

This sister got sick of being treated like a workhorse with no say. She doesn’t want to scare others away but hopes her old community gets better. It’s complicated, but she’s done.

Left religious life after getting sick and realizing convent life wasn’t sustainable. It was tough, confusing, but now married with a kid and still faithful.

Young sister was the only young one surrounded by older sisters who just weren’t into community or friendship. She ended up ferrying older sisters to doctors. So, she left.

It came down to crushing loneliness and depression. She was very independent and struggled to give that up. The day she left, she didn’t have to put her hair in a ponytail anymore — and boy, did that feel good.

This guy went to seminary for 1.5 years but was told to leave because his social skills didn’t fit the Church’s mold. That hit him hard—felt like failing at life God’s way. He lost faith for a while but found new friends and learned a ton, even if it was rough. Also, COVID lockdown was the cherry on top of that tough break.

Family friend who was a priest left because it got way too emotionally draining with family illnesses. Still a super-active Catholic though.

Spiritual director guessed this guy might be priest out of habit, not calling. He was right! Now a year married and happy as can be. Deo gratias!

Cousin just wanted to get married and start a family. So, he left seminary. Simple as that.

This person was in seminary as a lay grad student planning to join later but bailed after getting weird “personality profile” vibes and worrying about rejection due to sexual orientation. Stayed Catholic for years after though.